The Tree that Loved Me: Part 2 (Easter)

Sixteen year old Eric Irivuzumugabe ran with his grandfather from the horror that overtook their village. Separated from his grandfather and with nowhere else to hide, he scrambled up a cypress tree to escape the slaughter. There he listened, terrified, as he heard the sounds of violence and murder all around him. He heard the screams and could do nothing to help his family and friends. In one hundred days, one million Rwandan people died at the hands of their brothers and sisters in the 1994 genocide.
 

Eric and his three uncles survived by hiding in the trees, without any food or water, for fifteen days. During that time seventy of their family members were killed. Even though Eric’s father had read to him from the Bible throughout his childhood, he did not yet have a personal relationship with God. With unthinkable hatred and cruelty all around him, Eric could not believe in this “loving” God his father had tried to share with him.

Yet, he could not mistake the obvious voice that called to him as he clung to the cypress tree (known in Rwanda as “the tree of life”). Day after day, alternately praying for mercy and escape, and revenge on his enemies, Eric concentrated on staying alive. When he had no strength left to hold on, a voice coaxed Eric to focus on the branches in front of him, the leaves, the ants that busily traveled to and fro in the midst of unspeakable terror. 

Even though it was two years before Eric was able to let go of his fear and doubt, he never forgot the feeling of being held while hiding in those trees. The love of the Father encompassed him like nothing he’d ever felt before, and Eric knew God loved him; He had provided those trees to save him and his uncles. Eventually he came to know him as his true Father and Creator, Savior, and Provider.

In My Father, Maker of the Trees: How I Survived the Rwandan Genocide, Eric Irivuzumugabe tells his story of being reunited with his two brothers, and his long journey to faith and forgiveness (Baker Publishing Group). Now, he works to reach others orphaned by genocide and helps them through the process of forgiveness and healing that can only be found in Jesus Christ. He is a living testimony of Jesus’ power to help us forgive our enemies.

I listened to the audio book of Eric’s story on a road trip and alternately sobbed with grief over the tragedy and violence, then praised and rejoiced in God’s amazing work of redemption in and through Eric.  Before he could accept the cross of the One who loved him, Eric met God first in a cypress tree in the midst of unspeakable tragedy.

Easter will be here in less than three weeks. How many of us are “up a tree;” unable to celebrate the joy of Jesus’ resurrection because of hatred? Is there anyone standing between you and the cross—someone you can’t forgive because of the hurt they’ve caused you? Is your Father—your Maker—whispering to you now? With persistent words of love, does He compel you to—hold on, let go, forgive—to let Him be the strength you do not have?

Here is the link if you would like to hear Eric’s testimony in his own voice and get information about his book. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2yuA9yTsFP8

#Rwandan genocide #forgiving murder #surviving war #hearing God’s voice #up a tree

The Tree that Loved Me: Part 1 (Easter)

The next three posts are the stories of those who have come to faith through unusual experiences with trees. The following story is from a testimony I had the privilege to hear at a Celebrate Recovery meeting:

She climbed into “her” tree, traumatized after being forced to take part in an especially gruesome occult ceremony. Only nine years old, she had nowhere else to go, since her parents were the ones who led her in this worship of blood, abuse, and darkness. She didn’t know who God was, but she knew this was not what she wanted. There had to be something more.

In her tree she found safety. She came here often and told it everything. She held tightly to its trunk, as she rested in the fork where the limbs came together. She felt encompassed by love—as if all her pain drained into the tree, traveled down its trunk and out through the roots. Away from her. It was her only place of refuge on the Reservation.

Although one of her abusers, she did have one friend she could talk to. This woman seemed to care some about her welfare. But when the woman’s fiancé broke off their engagement, she despaired and began to threaten to kill herself. Missing the only scrap of attention she had received from anyone, the girl was annoyed by the constant whimper of complaints. She’d had enough, “Just do it then!” she screamed, “You always say you’re going to kill yourself, but you never do!”

The next day, she heard the news—her only friend had shot herself. Driven by guilt, she ran to her tree and sobbed for hours. Not long after, her family moved off the Reservation where there was no tree; nowhere to go for comfort. She hardened her heart to everyone around her. Never again would she love someone; she would never trust again. She became a fighter; she didn’t need anyone. Drugs became her escape, but her misery grew.

Against her will, she found herself drawn to a group of Christians at school. She openly despised them, even as she yearned for the joy she saw in their lives. In time, she found herself on the edge of their group, listening in. Then, one of the gang. They told her about Jesus and the cross where He died—out of love.

Suddenly she understood the Presence in her childhood tree was not a spirit of nature, but the Son of God reaching out to her the only way she could understand at the time. Rather than gruesome images of blood sacrifice, she associated with the occult, Jesus wooed her with tangible love. She realized her true tree was the cross where Jesus willingly gave himself as the sacrifice for sin. Before He rose again to conquer death and sin forever.

God had prepared her, so many years before, to hear the message of salvation at just the right time—when she was ready to give herself to Him completely. 

How wonderful we are loved by a God like this, who comes to us in ways we can accept and understand in the darkest hours of life. He met this little girl’s need for comfort through a tree she could cling to when no one else loved her, and brought her to himself through the love and joy of His people. 

Now, she lives for the Christ of the Tree that loved her. She loves Him. She’s forgiven. Free. And lives a life of purpose, telling others the hope Jesus has for them as well.

#the cross of Jesus #testimonies for Easter #unusual conversions to Christianity

Rooting for the Bad Guy

I’m living the final season of Downton Abbey with people I now feel I know personally. For almost six seasons—both the Crawley family and those who serve them—have ridden the storms and triumphs of war, heartbreak, marriage, birth, tragedy, death, imprisonment, and an ever-changing world. Some characters have become bitter, fearful of what might happen if they open up to love, or matured in their relationships and understanding of others.
 

I cheer and groan through each episode, hoping the ones who struggle will not give up. The conquerors are those who realize they need the warmth of love and relationship to survive. In the drama of it all, I find myself aching most for the bad guy who can’t seem to find a place to belong.

Barrow, the under-butler, has been the dark character of the series. Deceitful and conniving—he pitted himself against the rest of the staff early on for his own advantage. Now he’s reaping what he’s sown. 

Occasionally, he surprises with heroic, even selfless behavior; we get glimpses of his loneliness, and I want to give him another chance to turn around. He tries; it looks like he may have a friend after all, then he gets knocked down, and retreats once again to dark pride. 

  

Still, I root for Barrow. I want him to make it. In a turnaround episode, he is ill to the point of collapse, after subjecting himself to shock treatments and saline injections. Cora’s maid, Baxter, gets him to the doctor, even though she knows he’s the one who purposefully caused her such pain. In a rare moment of weakness, he berates himself for thinking he could actually alter his course. He expects her to join in; instead, Baxter offers kindness.  

One sincere word of praise opens Barrow’s heart. Maybe he can be a different kind of man—one who cares for others and not just himself.  This is exactly how God loves us. He knows we’re wretched and deceitful, conniving and selfish. Even when we try to change, our own efforts and believing the lies of the enemy, make us sicker than before. In shame, we admit our stupidity. What made us think we could ever change? Then Jesus comes and gives us hope.

 Scripture says of Jesus, “A bruised reed he will not break, and a smoldering wick he will not snuff out” (Isa. 42:3). We’ve been hurt by others, by ourselves, by our own stupid attempts to get better. We’re bruised and broken. We smolder, we sputter, but never can seem to burn strong. Jesus roots for bad guys who can’t quite get it together. That describes us all—all have sinned and fall short…

That’s why I want Barrow to make it. I’m rooting for him to find friendship and a place of belonging. I want others to see his heart. I know he’s just a character in a television series, but I ache for him to grow into the man God created him to be, because he represents all of us in our fight against the flesh.

We’re bad guys in a world of bad guys—overshadowed by past hurts, evil habits, and current hang ups, and the voice that tells us we’re not “good enough.” Yet we hunger for love. I found that kind of hope in Christ; I’m a bad guy reborn. So I root for other bad guys to find Him too. 

What tender words do you long to hear? 

What hope have you found in Christ that you can share with someone else today?

Fifty Ways to Say I Love You, Part 3

Today we’ll wrap up this Valentine series with the last two love languages. The first three were Words of Affirmation, Acts of Service, and Gifts. If you’re tuning in late, scroll down for parts 1 and 2 and then come back for today’s big finish.

Quality Time: Focused, Relaxed, Priority

This is one of my husband’s highest needs. He doesn’t take a lot of time off from work, but date night, Sundays, and special moments together are very important in our relationship. 

31. Brighten their day with an impromptu invitation for romance. One night my husband had been doing book work most of the evening. I sent him a text, “Would you like to join me for star gazing and praise music on the deck?” We shared the night sky together. 

32. Even a phone call can be quality time if your loved one can tell you have set aside all distractions just to connect. This isn’t always possible, especially if you have young children or are at work, but your full attention is a valuable gift. 

33. Get out in nature. Go for a hike or a drive, or take a vacation where you can admire the beauty of God’s creation. 

34. Turn your phone off during date night or for an agreed amount of time so you can have uninterrupted conversation and just focus on each other. 

35. Dance! Do a silly jig or strut your stuff with your spouse, friend, or children. Dance for fun, for exercise, or get close to your beloved. 

36. Use movies as conversation starters. Pause the action at a crucial point and ask your sweetheart what they think will happen next, or who is right or wrong in that situation. My sister sometimes asks her husband to make up a different ending if a movie is disappointing. She’s either satisfied by his version, or highly entertained by his tales. Either way it’s fun. 

37. Take time to enjoy simple pleasures. My husband came home the other night after dark and invited me to go for a walk. It was an unusually warm, winter evening and the sky was packed with stars. It didn’t take long to go once around the block, but it gave us time to reconnect and admire the beauty of the night. 

38. Read books aloud together. My husband wasn’t too sure about this at first because he’s never enjoyed reading. But we pick out books that interest both of us; they have become a private world of memories that only we share.

39. Work on home projects. This can be a satisfying way to spend time together. If you’re not using noisy equipment, it provides an opportunity for conversation and you can be proud of your handiwork when you’re finished. 

40. Pray together. If you pray with and not at each other, vulnerable and soft in the presence of God, this can be the biggest investment you make in your relationship. Honest communication with God draws us together—with our spouse, family, and close friends—like nothing else can. 

Meaningful Touch: Love and Affection 

Experts say we need at least ten meaningful touches a day for optimum health. Tapping someone on the shoulder to get their attention doesn’t count. All of us need to feel the love and affection of others around us through the sense of touch, married or single. Notice I don’t mention sex, even though I’m all for it in marriage. Our culture is so overrun with sexual images and innuendos that we’ve lost sight of using affectionate touch to meet the other person’s need. 

41.   Rest your hand on your beloved’s arm, hand, or leg during conversation. This lets them know they have your full attention. 

42.  Instead of greeting a child with a knuckle rub on his head (which I absolutely hated as a kid!), gently touch their head or stroke their hair as they stand next to you. Invite your beloved to rest his or her head in your lap and play with their hair. 

43.  Take the hand of the one you love as you walk along, or loop your arm through theirs. This tells them you’re proud to be connected. 

44.  Our hands have an impressive complexity of pleasure receptors. When sitting with your child or beloved, hold their hand palm up and stroke their palm and up and down their fingers, then playfully turn their hand over to explore the back as well. I begged my grandma and mom over and over to repeat the story about the puppy and the bunny that they played with my hands. It felt like love. 

45.  Wash each other’s feet then rub them with scented oil or lotion. 

46.  Hug! Hugging is a great way to greet or say goodbye to friends or family. And a long, lingering hug with your husband or wife can melt away stress and sorrow. It also leads to kisses. 

47.  Kiss! Kiss the top of your kid’s head, kiss away boo boo’s, and kiss and tickle your children. And of course, kiss your beloved every chance you get. 

48.  Touching someone’s face is reserved only for romantic love, because it is personal and tender. That’s what makes it special. Cupping their chin for a kiss, tracing the line of their ears or nose while gazing into their eyes is sure to make them feel special. 

49.  Care for your loved one’s wounds with a gentle touch and compassionate spirit. 

50.  Play footsie with your beloved—under the kitchen table, while watching a movie, or in bed. 

I hope this has given you some great ideas on how to share love this Valentine’s Day, and all year round. I warn you, though, once you get started, it’s addictive!