Wednesday, April 25, 2018

Feeling Invisible

Sometimes you want to blend in and go unnoticed, or bless someone without getting the credit. But for the most part, we want people to see us, remember us, and admire our work. Sometimes, we feel invisible and unimportant. Like an Amish doll with no face.

 
When I asked people what made them feel that way, they said:

“When people only know me if I’m with my husband.” 

“When I walked into my first college lecture and sat down with 200-300 other freshman I thought, ‘Who am I? Who even cares? Who would notice if I’m here or not?’ It was overwhelming after coming from high school honor classes with less than twenty students.”

“When I was in the army. I felt like I was just a number on a list, so they could schedule me for KP duty.”

 The first year of motherhood!” 

“When people who’ve known me for years still mispronounce my first name.”

As a child in an abusive home I learned to be invisible from a very early age. It's become a way of life.”


“In rehab. They told us we didn’t need to thank people, and we weren’t allowed to compliment others or have any physical contact (even hugs). This was very hard for me because I grew up in an incredibly loving and encouraging family who put emphasis on praise. And human touch was also huge. It was hard for me to feel good about myself when I never heard positive feedback.” 
 


“When I was the only vender at an event whose name was not listed on the program.”

“Sometimes as a busy wife and mom I feel all I do is clean, pick up, cook, and do laundry. With everyone’s busy schedule I think it gets taken for granted all the little things moms do to keep a house going. Then I remember God gave me this family to serve and it reminds me He is watching and He notices.”

 “Most days at church I feel invisible. I don’t know why.”

“At the end of my marriage my husband would enter and exit the room without acknowledging me; talk to me without making eye contact; and lay beside me in bed without touching. He didn’t see me anymore.”

“At my last job I felt unnoticed and ignored in my department, by my supervisor and other employees. People who still work there occasionally say, ‘Hey, haven’t seen you lately.’ I haven’t worked there for eight months!”

“When I walk in the door after work and no one pauses long enough to greet me anymore.”

“When all my six children were teenagers.”


If you can relate to these examples, you know how painful it can be to feel invisible.

Hagar was Abram and Sarai’s Egyptian slave. They got tired of waiting for God to give them a child and Hagar got caught in the middle. When she got pregnant by Abram, Hagar flaunted it; Sarai mistreated her. Abram caved to his wife’s demands, and Hagar ran away to the desert. She had reason to feel angry, used, afraid, and like she didn’t matter to anyone. That’s when God did a beautiful thing.

The angel of the LORD let her know she wasn’t alone.  He told her she had a future and so did her child. He said to go back and serve her mistress. After this visit from God, she felt like she could. Hagar said, “You are the God who sees me…I have now seen the One who sees me” (Gen. 16:13). 

Sometimes we’re mistreated by God’s own people. Hagar was. When God’s plan takes too long, His people sometimes try their own way, and we make a mess. We hurt people. They end up feeling unimportant and invisible. 

Hagar started comparing herself to Sarai and enjoyed feeling superior for once; the servant had one on the mistress. But then everything fell apart. Have you ever done that and ended up losing everything?  Then, ashamed and afraid, you run away. Worries come—How will you survive? How can you go back? Does anybody care whether you live or die?

Like Hagar, we have a Heavenly Father who knows us by name. He sees who we are and everything we do. He looks on our accomplishments and efforts with parental pride and delight. He is the God who sees you; you’re not invisible.  

“You have searched me, LORD, and you know me.” Psalm 139:1

Jesus sees each of us before we know Him personally and He wants us to come to Him and be loved. “‘How do you know me?’ Nathanael asked. Jesus answered, ‘I saw you while you were still under the fig tree before Philip called you.’”John 1:48 

“Do not fear, for I have redeemed you; I have summoned you by name; you are mine.” Isaiah 43:1

Even when your emotions tell you no one sees you or cares what happens to you, there is One who does. And He loves you unconditionally.

#Godwhoseesme #youknowme #Iseeyou #Heknowsmyname #feelingunimportant #nooneseeswhatIdo

Thursday, April 12, 2018

Warm and Spacious


I’m a little claustrophobic, so I hate being in places where there’s not enough room—like airplane seats, going to your kid’s school and having to sit in a child-sized chair for parent/teacher conference, restaurants where tables are packed in too tightly, and clothes that are too small because, well, maybe I’ve had too many desserts lately. 

This has even been used as a method of torture in prisons. Making people stand in a box that nails have been driven into from every direction. So every time they begin to fall asleep or slump, nails jab into their skin. Or putting them in a slot that’s just big enough to lie down in, but not tall enough to sit or adjust their position in any way. 

I also like to be warm and cozy, so standing outside in the cold is, to me, a form of torture. And have you ever tried to snuggle up in a blanket that was too small to cover you completely? Every time you turn over your feet or back hit the cold air and you wake up.

These are the things I think about when I read: “The bed is too short to stretch out on, the blanket too narrow to wrap around you” (Isaiah 28:20). What is Isaiah getting at here? He’s talking about what life is like when we try to get comfortable outside of a relationship with God.

I don’t mean religion. That’s a cold, hard bed with a very narrow blanket in itself. Turn from the list of man made rules and you’ll end up on the floor and out of favor. No, I’m talking about being a believer in, and lover of Jesus Christ, and following His lead. Walking and talking with Him, and trusting His plan.

That habit, that relationship, that job, that diploma, that sports car—they don’t satisfy for long. You’ll end up feeling cramped and desperate to break free of the confines around you. It won’t keep you warm enough to ignite your stone cold heart. I know. I’ve lived with God and without God, and baby, it’s cold out there without Him. But there is warmth, comfort, security, and joy in the presence of Christ.


If you can’t get a good night of sleep, because of guilt, worry, loneliness, an aching need to be loved and accepted, you know what it feels like out in the cold. Tossing and turning on a space too small to ever get rest. Jesus said, “Are you tired? Worn out? Burned out on religion? Come to me. Get away with me and you’ll recover your life. I’ll show you how to take a real rest. Walk with me and work with me—watch how I do it. Learn the unforced rhythms of grace. I won’t lay anything heavy or ill-fitting on you. Keep company with me and you’ll learn to live freely and lightly” (Matt. 11:28-30, Message).

If you haven’t tried Jesus, what do you have to lose? In Him is freedom. In Him we rest and are warmed by His faithful love.

#roomtostretchout #bedtooshort #blanketoonarrow #satisfactioninJesus #Isaiah28:20 #Matt11:28