Quality Time: Focused, Relaxed, Priority
This is one of my husband’s highest
needs. He doesn’t take a lot of time off from work, but date night, Sundays, and
special moments together are very important in our relationship.
31. Brighten
their day with an impromptu invitation for romance. One night my husband had
been doing book work most of the evening. I sent him a text, “Would you like to join
me for star gazing and praise music on the deck?” We shared the night sky
together.
32. Even
a phone call can be quality time if your loved one can tell you have set aside
all distractions just to connect. This isn’t always possible, especially if you
have young children or are at work, but your full attention is a valuable gift.
33. Get
out in nature. Go for a hike or a drive, or take a vacation where you can
admire the beauty of God’s creation.
34. Turn
your phone off during date night or for an agreed amount of time so you can
have uninterrupted conversation and just focus on each other.
35. Dance!
Do a silly jig or strut your stuff with your spouse, friend, or children. Dance
for fun, for exercise, or get close to your beloved.
36. Use
movies as conversation starters. Pause the action at a crucial point and ask
your sweetheart what they think will happen next, or who is right or wrong in
that situation. My sister sometimes asks her husband to make up a different
ending if a movie is disappointing. She’s either satisfied by his version, or
highly entertained by his tales. Either way it’s fun.
37. Take
time to enjoy simple pleasures. My husband came home the other night after dark
and invited me to go for a walk. It was an unusually warm, winter evening and
the sky was packed with stars. It didn’t take long to go once around the block,
but it gave us time to reconnect and admire the beauty of the night.
38. Read
books aloud together. My husband wasn’t too sure about this at first because he’s
never enjoyed reading. But we pick out books that interest both of us; they
have become a private world of memories that only we share.
39. Work
on home projects. This can be a satisfying way to spend time together. If
you’re not using noisy equipment, it provides an opportunity for conversation
and you can be proud of your handiwork when you’re finished.
40. Pray
together. If you pray with and not at each other, vulnerable and soft in
the presence of God, this can be the biggest investment you make in your
relationship. Honest communication with God draws us together—with our spouse,
family, and close friends—like nothing else can.
Meaningful Touch: Love and Affection
Experts say we need at least ten
meaningful touches a day for optimum health. Tapping someone on the shoulder to
get their attention doesn’t count. All of us need to feel the love and affection
of others around us through the sense of touch, married or single. Notice I
don’t mention sex, even though I’m all for it in marriage. Our culture is so
overrun with sexual images and innuendos that we’ve lost sight of using affectionate
touch to meet the other person’s need.
41.
Rest your hand on your beloved’s arm, hand, or
leg during conversation. This lets them know they have your full attention.
42.
Instead
of greeting a child with a knuckle rub on his head (which I absolutely hated as
a kid!), gently touch their head or stroke their hair as they stand next to
you. Invite your beloved to rest his or her head in your lap and play with
their hair.
43.
Take
the hand of the one you love as you walk along, or loop your arm through
theirs. This tells them you’re proud to be connected.
44.
Our
hands have an impressive complexity of pleasure receptors. When sitting with
your child or beloved, hold their hand palm up and stroke their palm and up and
down their fingers, then playfully turn their hand over to explore the back as
well. I begged my grandma and mom over and over to repeat the story about the
puppy and the bunny that they played with my hands. It felt like love.
45.
Wash
each other’s feet then rub them with scented oil or lotion.
46.
Hug!
Hugging is a great way to greet or say goodbye to friends or family. And a
long, lingering hug with your husband or wife can melt away stress and sorrow.
It also leads to kisses.
47.
Kiss!
Kiss the top of your kid’s head, kiss away boo boo’s, and kiss and tickle your
children. And of course, kiss your beloved every chance you get.
48.
Touching
someone’s face is reserved only for romantic love, because it is personal and
tender. That’s what makes it special. Cupping their chin for a kiss, tracing
the line of their ears or nose while gazing into their eyes is sure to make
them feel special.
49.
Care
for your loved one’s wounds with a gentle touch and compassionate spirit.
50.
Play
footsie with your beloved—under the kitchen table, while watching a movie, or
in bed.
I hope this has given you some great
ideas on how to share love this Valentine’s Day, and all year round. I warn
you, though, once you get started, it’s addictive!
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